Are You Stuck in "I Can't" Parenting
Feb 14, 2024
Are You Stuck in "I Can't" Parenting?
Are You Stuck in "I Can't" Parenting? - Recently, a mom who did a Discovery Call with me a year ago reached out to join my Moms' Group. Amazing! In our first call, she shared why she needed that year to finally join:
“Last year, I wasn’t ready to try and figure it out. It was like, ok, there’s a barrier, and I’m not ready to deal with that barrier.”
Parenting is Problem-Solving
Amen! Parenting IS problem-solving, and sometimes one more problem is one problem too many. This mom had to figure some stuff out to make the group work for her, and in the end, they were pretty simple solutions (moving a standing appointment, logging in after her daughter's bedtime, etc), but they sure as hell didn't feel simple at first! She had to first make a shift I help parents with every day:
I can't → How can I?
Without this, we don't even TRY to find solutions! But it can be tough to change! "I can't" mode often feels comfy and familiar, so we tell ourselves a bunch of BS like we should worry about what changing might reveal (Is this all my fault?). Or that better isn't even possible (My situation is weird, so this can't work for me). Or that we don't deserve things to be better (That stuff is for other people; I can be ok with what I have now). Or that we shouldn't need support (Other people manage without help; I should be able to do this alone). Whatever the reason, obstacles can seem like a relief when we're in this place (Oh darn, guess I can't do it, shucks)!
Helping you switch to "How can I?" is what I do.
Sometimes, the most powerful thing you need from me is help to create that shift, even more than you need actual solutions! For example, I have a client who has known for months that she wants to limit technology with her son, but it hasn't felt very easy to her until now. Finally, today, we created a plan she knows she can execute. Once she got help making the switch, she immediately saw a solution.
How often does "I can't" mode stop you?
What are things you want to do but have told yourself you can't, so you haven't found solutions? Do you really want to wait a whole year (or your whole life!) to figure them out? Of course not! EVERYTHING comes from this shift.
If talking to me about working together has been one of those things, book a call now! No matter how stuck you feel, you're here with me now, reading this message, which means part of you is already in "How can I?" mode. I'm here to help YOU, just like I help all my clients fan those flames. Going from hopeless about your parenting problems to deciding this is too important not to figure out is the beginning of every great thing you'll create for your family. I can help you step into belief and figure out every obstacle that has stumped you up until now!
Learn more about group parent coaching here.
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